Something Is Wrong

Recently one of my grandchildren was the victim of bullying.  The school handling the situation did a very poor job.  We attempted to offer positive solutions to the principal, the superintendent and the school board.  Our suggestions were stonewalled.  We continued to press for changes and it seems as though the school board is making changes.

I made a few deliveries of packages to some of our local schools.  I commented to my dispatcher that there were a lot of police cars at each school.  My dispatcher stated that the schools in our area had increased the police presence for safety.

This bothers me in many ways.  Many years ago when my youngest daughter was attending high school, there was a resource officer assigned to her school.  I did not think it was a good thing.  I felt it was probably going to end up in our civil rights being violated in multiple ways.

My daughter built a relationship with that resource officer.  He changed her perspective on police, on crime and criminals in numerous ways.  While I did not agree with police at school it ended up being an absolute blessing in our family.  In our modern society we find it difficult to connect with police officers, fire fighters or emt’s.  I do believe that having personal relationships with the professionals that protect and serve us- we have a stronger community as a whole.

I am grateful that we are able to offer police within the schools for protection.  But I feel this is a bad band-aid and not a solution to the problem.  While I have to agree that we have horrible problem with people shooting up schools, students and faculty, why?  Lots of the cases in the media have been traced back to bullying issues that were never taken care of.

This tells me that my grandsons case is not the only one handled poorly.  We as a society are not repairing the damage done by bullies.  I was bullied in school.  I was also a bully.  When I was a bully I was reprimanded for my behavior.  When I was bullied I was given retribution, in the form of my bully had to apologize to me in the principal’s office.   I am not an expert but I recognize that both ends brought the issue to a closure.  I did not contemplate revenge because there was closure for me.

How can we bring our youth closure when they battle these issues?  How do we bring an end to these young people being accosted through social media, texting and so forth?  How do we help our youth learn empathy for one another?

Many people state we learn our behavior from our parents.  Other believe the responsibility belongs to the schools.   I believe it takes a village to raise a child.  We must speak up when we see wrongs being done.   We must correct our children when they are mean to others.  We must also set the example to be kind to others.  And we have to find a way to help our children find closure when they have been accosted.  If we do not we will continue to lose these babies to suicide or to mass shootings.

Our schools are being attacked and we are using the police as a band-aid.  We need to fix the problem of why our schools are being attacked.  Part of the problem is that the administrators treat everyone as a second class citizen.  Children and parents are intentionally excused from conversations as though they are dumb.  When you attempt to file a grievance it is ignored.

While it is not my desire to lay all the blame onto schools- that is where the problems are happening.  It makes sense to me that is where we begin making changes.  I do not think we will ever stop bullying.  We need to learn proactive ways to deal with it.  We need to give our youth closure when they are faced with bullying.  Allow them to receive apologies from their bullies.  Give them the chance to heal from being attacked.

When an adult is found guilty of computer hacking one of the common sentences is no computer privileges ever again.  Is there a way to implement no access to cell phones, social media and such if a youth is found guilty of cyber bullying? While schools need internet it needs to be guarded much better than it is.  Today’s youth are running a muck with the free internet access they have at school.  Yes it needs to be managed at home, too.  But I listen to the youth today and most of them have free access to the internet while at school.

Schools this is for you- you are doing something VERY wrong!  If you were doing things so right, people would not want to attack you!  You would not need police for protection.  I pray this begins a revolution in how to do things right!  Let’s heal these youth.  Let’s strengthen our education system.  Let’s be the change we want to see in the world!



Texting Etiquette??

I have to admit that I am old.  Communication and the way we do it has changed many times in my lifetime.  While I am a Grandma, and even a Great Grandma I do text.  I text on a daily basis.

I remember when my oldest granddaughter began texting.  I was always after her for poor spelling and grammar.  Hence she rarely texts me anymore.  I am saddened by this but I do feel strongly that etiquette should be taught to each of us.

Recently I sent a text to a relative that I had not ever texted.  Instead of assuming she would know who was on the other end of that strange phone number I started my text like this:  Hi (Name), This is Rebecca, (Regina’s Mom) yadda, yadda, yadda.  I would have done the same thing if I had called this person- or written them an email or snail mail- so why shouldn’t it be done in a text?

Recently I received a text from a person requesting work through our delivery business.  It was vague and the person assumed I would know exactly who they were.  Well I have two clients with the same name and as Murphy’s Law demands I went to the wrong client.

I do understand how and why people text the way they do- I am simply writing in hopes of pulling some of them out of their self absorbed world and change the way they send a text.  First- if you are not texting EVERYDAY with someone do not assume that they know exactly who you are or what you want.  Take the time to say- This is (NAME).  Second- reread your text before you hit send!  Some of the auto correct features make text messages undecipherable.  Which means that now you will be exchanging several texts to clear up confusion.  Third- if you are using text messages to do business- please be respectful of the times you are sending them!  Honestly a text at 3 AM is just downright rude!

I know each of us are busy!  I know text messages are a quick way to get something done!  But they are quicker and more efficient if you identify yourself, proof read your text and last but not least make sure it isn’t in the middle of the night!